Não sei o que aconteceu comigo hoje, acordei numa melancolia enorme. Dia estranho, fui na praça da paz quando ainda estava claro e nublado, sentei no banco e olhei ao redor, me lembrei de como alí naquele mesmo lugar aconteceram momentos tão bons na minha vida. Épocas mesmo maravilhosas... é incrível como as coisas mudam tanto, naquele tempo eu pensava que tudo que eu vivia ia durar tanto, que momentos como aqueles iam sempre existir, se repetir...
Nem se eu pudesse voltar no tempo e viver tudo de novo resolveria, pois eu viveria com essa minha cabeça de hoje, cheia de ilusões quebradas, cheia de coisas que aprendi. Bom mesmo é não saber de nada sobre a vida. Depois que você aprende tudo perde seu encanto, você descobre que ser racional é bem melhor que viver sem os pés no chão... mas como isso pode ser melhor? Não consigo mais ter os sonhos que tinha, confiar nas pessoas que eu depositava todo meu respeito, amar sem sofrer nenhuma vez.
Quebrei a cara muitas vezes, chorei, fui traída, tive minhas pernas e mãos quebradas... fiquei sem saber o que fazer com tudo aquilo, mas no fim entendi... que foi só pra eu me tornar assim, ranzinza, partida e com essa minha simpatia idiota. Uma bagagem de coisas nas costas, alma, cabeça... enfim, eu cresci.
O que me consola é saber que pelo menos eu vivi, vivi muito... continuo vivendo, e talvez eu esteja aqui reclamando precipitadamente, pode ser que a minha bagagem aumente ainda mais e mais tarde eu venha aqui nesse mesmo blog dizer que nesse dia que eu sentei no banco da praça eu era feliz e não sabia.
Essa é a vida, pra quem entendeu o que ela tem a te oferecer... é só pessimismo.
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